I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years and 8 months before the summer. He was an amazing man, sincere, ambitious, romantic… he was 8 years older and we started talking when i was 16. Our relationship accelerated and we were going too too fast. I felt so guilty all the time and i blamed myself for it. He would never see the essence of what we did as anything.. The majority of our relationship was long distance save the year and few months he moved to the same city. He then applied for school across the world.

I was friends with his older sister before i met him and i knew that breaking up would not only be a blow to him but to her.. it might risk our friendship. When i couldnt take it anymore i called him and that was that. I called his sister the next day and she was fine with it… and i was relieved. Until an exchange of words with my family that changed it all. She wanted nothing to do with my family, she wanted to end all interactions and a week later she and her husband decide to put their house on sale. I cannot avoid her until she moves.. and all our interactions are awkward and tense. She was like an older sister to me and her actions have been disappointing.

After all this i still love him and care for him but i knew that i could not continue to be in this relationship. i always felt like i owed him for all that he did and that the love i had was not genuine but out of gratitude.

This has been a very hard few months as she looks and avoids me like i have leprosy. How do i train myself to move on and keep my head high?