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Genuine people at work ?

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  • July 1, 2016 at 1:35 pm #108679
    vidalevi
    Participant

    Hi All…
    I want to understand the situation at my ex- workplace.
    I have friends and acquaintances in my old workplace since I was working there for 5 years.
    I will share a scenario and would like to know what is the deal here.
    Lets say there is this guy in the office who is good in his work and everybody loves him including the boss. But whenever I worked with him he really came across as a pervert and hitting on girls mostly. He has since left the office but in touch within our networking sites. When I was with my real friends his topic came n even them confirmed that he is like that to them also. Infact a girl even knew him from college days and told me that he was the same back them. But in my office everyone keeps him at a high pedestal that they look past everything.
    Even then whenever he achieves anything all of them(even the one who spoke about him with me),they are the first ones to compliment him and flocks around him.
    The problem is I cant be like that- knowing someone is like that; yet projecting something else outside. At the end I become the only person who us tagged as ‘not so friendly’ among them.
    All I want to know is should I also go with the flow and praise someone for his achievements professionally though he might be a shitty person inside or should I be like how I’m right now ? Any thoughts?

    July 1, 2016 at 2:00 pm #108680
    Nekoshema
    Participant

    stick to your morals in the end, but if someone did a good job at work, you should say ‘good job on that report’ to be nice, instead of turning up your nose at them because they’re kind of a jerk. you wouldn’t want that planting a bitter seed inside you and it slowly grows until you’re grumpy and don’t know why. some people will overlook things because the person can make them laugh or help them in times of need. i wouldn’t try to be buddy-buddy with the guy, but at least be civil. best of luck to you.

    July 1, 2016 at 4:24 pm #108688
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear vidalevi:

    My input: If he disrespects you personally or if he disrespects another person in your presence, a woman perhaps, then assert yourself: tell him that what he just said is wrong, hurtful, to you or to the woman present. If he achieves something professionally, he has lots of people praising him already, you don’t need to join the crowd praising him.

    So if he is not abusing you or someone in your presence then don’t praise him, flatter him, smile at him – all this is not genuine on your part. Simply express nothing to him.

    If a woman complains to you about him outside his presence, suggest that she asserts herself with him. Talking about him otherwise is gossip and is not a good practice at work or elsewhere.

    anita

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