Matty,
Thank you, this does help a lot. I don’t have to compete or have a definition that suits other people. It’s just frustrating to have so many things in my life that feel isolating. It seems like everyone I know has some beliefs and will tell me to leave it in God’s hands and I often don’t know what to say back.

Anita,
I am at this point and I do agree. How do I get over this feeling of dread that there might not actually be anything? The feeling of nothingness after death? Or if a hell does exist but I choose not to believe ?