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Key phrases that make me concerned–you are BEGINNING therapy. Therapy may take a while–definitely if you are pouring your heart out you are going to feel raw. I just had my first therapy without shedding any tears within last month–after 2 years. I felt better and better I learned more and more but for me crying and hurting in a safe place was so healing. I have empathy for what you are going thru. Please be patient with yourself and your journey
You are just learning how to communicate with a trained therapist–your FRIENDS are not trained–telling them what is going on with you and your therapist may be a big mistake, not surprising they aren’t telling you or acting in a way that is positive for your growth.
Maybe next therapy appointment you could tell your therapist what you said here and see what she/he says. Maybe a support group would be suggested…Or maybe not. You and your friends cant fix each other right now. You need to take care of you. Your friends who have it together but don’t support you, may not be able to extend the time and energy you need and still “keep it together”. Your unhappy friends sure cant be sounding boards and give you good advice.
You are not going to figure it all out yet– this site may help you, but take away what helps not what doesn’t. I have gotten great advice. I have also applied advice given to others to myself–other times I have totally known it wasn’t good advice for me. There are some nice people here–there are some confused people here. (I can be both–but my intent is sincere LOL )
Be kind to yourself–give it time
Hugs
Seaisland