Dear epodc7:

Congratulations for two months of not being abusive and for aiming at improving every day. As to your question whether to continue contact with her, contact that she initiates, my answer is:

No. Sincerely apologize in great detail for abusing her: write down all the ways you abused her, so nothing is ambiguous, no excuses, no: ‘I was hurt and that is why I said those words..’

Take full responsibility for your wrong doings against her, detail them and then express true regret and remorse. In that written communication that I am suggesting here, tell her that it is best to have no more contact because you need to heal from the hurt and anger you have in you from BEFORE meeting her and you need to do it while no longer in contact with her. In addition to it, you can add that you believe it is best for her as she needs to heal from your abuse of her (and probably from others’ abuse of her before meeting you, which may be the reason she accepted your abuse and still contacts you).

anita