Hey serenity.

I think, from what I read you are doing kinda great. You live in a shared house, that’s awesome. You are out there, looking for a job do to! You are single and open for adventures as well as settling down 😉 You have joined a gym!

Anything can happen – as long as you keep yourself open for ALL options – becoming fixated on having a partner and a house and a specific job might block you away from something that you would rather actually be doing for the rest of your life.

I can understand how seeing “everyone else” settle down and do their idyllic classical family-thing might give you the idea that you’re having a bad performance or something – but that is not true!

Do you realize that A WHOLE LOT OF PEOPLE settle down for the exact same sensation of fear and feeling you are experiencing right now?

Read that line again and let that sink in.

People settle down because they are afraid of missing the train, not because they have found “true love” or the “perfect partner.”

Wouldn’t it bother you to find a partner and settle down with them only for the sake of making that insecurity go away?

So, that feeling of insecurity goes away, but the partner sets you a whole other lot of ultimatums. You are no longer free to do whatever you please, whatever it is you would enjoy. You’d be walking the shoes of a family-person – playing by the same rules everyone else, with the same responsibilties that everyone else…

And oh yes, the people who are living that life will constantly remind you and try to make you believe that you are a lesser being without those shoes and responsibilities – they are doing their best to convince you that they have achieved the greatest goals in life and anything you choose to do different from them, they will remember to signal you how they see it as inferior.

I do not mean to sound mad! Forgive them, they are just trying to make sense of their own choices in life – just don’t let them get to you x.x

Wouldn’t you rather try to truly connect with people or your chosen acitivies instead – do what you truly enjoy doing, hang out with people to whom you don’t constantly have to keep proving yourself to, hang around people who don’t need to prove anything to you etc?

Maybe the “not trying” part isn’t all wrong after all – you can keep doing all the things that you have been enjoying – but do them for the right reasons. Go to the gym because you need to take care of your body, not because you want to build a family. Go to social groups because you want to see people, learn things, maybe teach them something from your own – not because you want to build a family… You can do ANYTHING you enjoy for the sake of enjoying it, not for the agenda of finding a parnter and settling down.

Remain curious of all people and all things! The universe is fascinating x.x

Who knows, might work out well :3

Take care o/