Dear ag,

I understand the bullying bit, especially about weight. I was bullied about acne, my weird ways and God knows what. But after 6 years, at 24, I can offer you some perspective.

You are 18 now and there is a big, uncertain world out there. It’s scary and few things are there which make you feel secure. I understand that. The thing about parents is they too have their own set of problems, they are human too and have their flwas. They can hold our hand, give us a roof, support us in their own way but they can’t walk the path for us.

When I was about 16, I was a pretty angry person and felt utterly disconnected from my parents. Though they always gave me their time, provided best facilties, I didnt understand that they too were struggling financially and had lot of stress, uncertainty on their plate.

I often used to wonder why can’t they tell me what to do, what’s the right way and then I would get irritated when when they suggested things. So you can see the contradiction here.

Now I see things more from their point of view and feel kind of amazed how the heck they managed with all their difficulties. I try to be more patient and helpful.

Yesterday my dad told me something that really comforted me in a way and I want to share it with you. He said, “since the last 5 years you were studying in college away from home, I have observed one thing in you which is indecisiveness. You are listening and getting swayed too much by the words, opinions of others. You need to have more confidence and find your own individuality, not based on my opinion or anyone elses but yours. I will always be there to support you but you have to be brave enough to walk your own path”

And that’s what I am asking you to do too – the mean words, acts are there and anxieties of home are there. You cant change the past but there is a future out there for you. Its uncertain and you cant see it clearly but how you deal with the present will determine it.

You are growing and changing – you might always be a little quiet, you might feel a little nervous but be brave, assertive and don’t give in to what those idiots told you that you aren’t good enough. Imagine a world that seems out of your reach right now and work towards it. Accept that you have your own path to walk and don’t let anyone undermine you otherwise.

Regards,
Nina