Dear bricklady:

I like what he planned to say to his kids, maybe already did.

I wonder: what did your therapist suggest to you regarding this situation and will you see him/ her again? If so, is there a plan of action suggested by the therapist?

Regarding the hope you mentioned- having too much of it can make you, over time, impatient and frustrated, if things don’t change for a long time. Watch that hope so it … doesn’t get out of hand.

When you told him: ” “you need time, no problem. Take it. I support this 1000%. I want you to work through this and be happier. There is no time table on how long this will take.”- I understand you meant it, and felt good saying it. The thing is, it will not be easy to maintain this attitude day after day, week after week, if that is how long it takes. Maybe months with no end in sight.

Prepare for the long haul. Reality is all your stuff that was in his place were removed and none is in his place. This is a separation move, not a getting-together move.

Temper your hope, keep it like glowing embers, not a flaming fire.

anita