Dear Anita:

I recognize that understanding is one of the most powerful ways of feeling good. But that’s the problem, I have the facts but it doesn’t really power through. But I think it’s one of those times where time have to take its course. Since there are real feelings involved I get ambivalent about my core values. It’s hard to stay on the same path and be confident right now. Also I keep comparing myself to this girl like she’s some perfect being I should become. But I keep reminding myself to only be present in my own reality and not letting someone else define me. It’s frustrating, I know exactly what I did wrong and how I should be thinking but the emotions takes over.

Some examples on when I do things without thinking it through:

– Buying something expensive when I know I’m low on cash

– Getting hammered on alcohol when I know I start early the next day

– Say things I know I’m going to regret and take back but feels good in the moment (totally crazy)

I only came up with three though. Made me feel better thank you. Feels like it isn’t that bad after all.