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Tommy

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  • #147893
    Tommy
    Participant

    Dear Anita:

    I recognize that understanding is one of the most powerful ways of feeling good. But that’s the problem, I have the facts but it doesn’t really power through. But I think it’s one of those times where time have to take its course. Since there are real feelings involved I get ambivalent about my core values. It’s hard to stay on the same path and be confident right now. Also I keep comparing myself to this girl like she’s some perfect being I should become. But I keep reminding myself to only be present in my own reality and not letting someone else define me. It’s frustrating, I know exactly what I did wrong and how I should be thinking but the emotions takes over.

    Some examples on when I do things without thinking it through:

    – Buying something expensive when I know I’m low on cash

    – Getting hammered on alcohol when I know I start early the next day

    – Say things I know I’m going to regret and take back but feels good in the moment (totally crazy)

    I only came up with three though. Made me feel better thank you. Feels like it isn’t that bad after all.

     

    #147879
    Tommy
    Participant

    Dear Anita:

    Thank you for taking your time to reply. I’ve never encountered this type of fear in my childhood. But I had a tough time growing up. Parents constantly fighting, bullied in school and by my cousins. And because of this, my self esteem and confidence is low. I’ve done many mistakes in later years, both financially and socially. I’ve had this ambivalence when it comes to making the same mistakes and not really learning from them. Doing stuff without thinking it through. So really I know the cause of my behavior and how it affects relationships. It makes me not care so much about myself and causes self destructive behavior. Basically sometimes I just say or do things without even thinking of the consequences. Hopefully the pain and agony I’m in right know will make me grow up (I’m only 22) because for the first time in my life I feel like I really got a grip on myself.

    But it’s unbearable. I’m miserably at home and at work. I’ve lost this girl who I think could’ve been the real deal and I’m starting to lose myself. I don’t know how to get up and keep going.

     

Viewing 2 posts - 1 through 2 (of 2 total)