Hi Mark

thank you for your reply.

Yes you are right i can always love myself,  I thought I did but actually i don’t through the actions and thoughts i have.

I like the way you make a list  with strategies on how to change for improve yourself. Weightloss is one thing i want o do but i think there are more things i can improve on.

I agree that moving forward can be gradual, i would hope by this time next year i’m not feeling the way I feel today, however it might take longer too.

I think whats making me depressed is loneliness, feeling i have wasted my life so far as I have made zero progress on anything worthwhile, putting my trust in someone and accepting situations others would run from, wanting a man that obviously doesn’t want me in the same way but i can’t bring myself to admit it or leave him alone, these things trouble me and go around in my head everyday that i find i hard to concentrate at work and on top of that would love to have friends to talk to about my feelings and to laugh with and essentially enjoy my life, rather then it seems i’m on a an endless road with no turnings to get off.

Thank for your kind thoughts Mark