Dear drinkmorewater:

Thank you for the reminder, by the way, to drink more water!

I understand your concern about your girlfriend. If you start a family with her, it will be frustrating for you to see her continue to misspend her time and resources on original family members, receiving as a result more of the same disrespect and mistreatment from them, while that time and resources are taken away from your chosen family with her, from you and your future children.

I would say, better postpone such plans until and if you are confident, following much communication with her, that her loyalty and investment would be to her chosen family, a family where the rules-of-engagement will include empathy and respect as well positive return-on-investment of time and resources.

anita