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Reply To: I don’t know why I am like this.

HomeForumsPurposeI don’t know why I am like this.Reply To: I don’t know why I am like this.

#170461
Brayden
Participant

Thank you guys for the responses. The main two things I have been going through are, me being gay with a homophobic family, and my parents are getting divorced. To be honest, I don’t really even feel anything from my parents getting divorced, and I mostly rely on myself for happiness, and other things. Me being gay is a big issue though. I’ve been out for about a year at school, and that was a big mistake. My brother goes to my school this year and he’s as homophobic as my parents. One of his friends told him that I asked out this one guy last year, so now I don’t know what to think. I honestly don’t care what happens anymore. My older brother shares the same views of me, so he’s sort of a “breather.” Also, mental issues have been an issue for me. It started out as health anxiety, and I feel like it has just made everything worse. I’ll slack off at school, but I still get good grades. By me slacking off, I mean being loud, annoying, and obnoxious in class. Most of it comes from me not feeling “connected.” I have memory issues, I overthink, I overreact. And I react to these by thinking that I have some brain issues like a brain tumor, or a defective brain. My anxiety has calmed down a little bit, but on the flip side, I have been careless, and sad. I feel so “out there” compared to everybody else. I have a good amount of friends that stick up for me and are there for me, but I just don’t feel like they need to do that. I feel like they feel obligated to hang out with me. I just want to move far away and start a new life, and I just want to leave everybody behind.