Hi Gigi,

He is using the miscarriage and grief counselling as an excuse to see you. It is called Plausible Deniability and you have fallen for it. Don’t get me wrong: men do go through emotions after a pregnancy loss. But would-have-been parents don’t go to GRIEF counselling (which in your case is really couple’s therapy??). They go to a Pregnancy Loss Support group. Maybe. (I’m not trying to be totally insensitive. I’ve had two miscarriages. But my DH and I wouldn’t have gone to a grief counsellor unless there was a funeral and a burial plot. Know what I mean?)

Also, I think he is addicted to the drama. You never sounded like enough “on paper” for him. But she is. Yet here he is pining and crying over you. Yet he won’t let her go. Yet you two will never work out. etc.

Please.

It is time he finds his own drama: The drama that comes when you quit going to this therapist, when you stop taking his calls, visits and texts.

You need to be set free of this, Gigi.

Best,

Inky

• This reply was modified 7 years, 1 month ago by Inky.