Hi well im completly new to this but I needed to give something a go and try to get some sort of advice!

I’ll keep it as short as i can and thank you in advance for any replies!

Basically I’m really struggling to get over my ex. Honestly I love her, alot, and I thought she felt the same until out of the blue she told me she no longer wants the relationship. Now we have had our fair share of ups and downs and we have been through an awful lot in a short space of time. We lost a baby in January 2017 which kills me everyday and I know that is something I will never get over but this is just adding even more upset and depression.

We were on and off with alot of hiding our relationship until October last year ( not my choice ) until she finally decided she wanted to be proper and out in the open which we did and I couldn’t of been happier but then it started going downhill again.. we both found a house together and the plan was I would move in and she would move in December last year this then got pushed to January and then she started saying not until the summer of this year. Gutting for me but I accepted it and would work with it.  She then started being really blunt and distant, wasn’t bothered if she saw me or not would get funny with me when I asked her what was up and didn’t want to do anything. I tried my absolute best to make her happy more than I ever have with anyone but got nothing back but despite all that, I miss her like crazy and I love her. I shouldn’t, but I do. I should hate her but I can’t. I’ve done the writing down pros / cons and eventhough there is more cons I still can’t change my mind on her and it’s destroying me.

How it ended just didn’t seem right I dropped her home on a Sunday afternoon she gave me a kiss told me she loved me and by 9pm that night she said she didn’t want it anymore.   This isn’t the first time she has left me and said the same things either it’s always been her to call it off and come back promising it wouldn’t happen again and i put all my trust in her everytime. i don’t know what I did that was so wrong I will never know. All i know is i love her more than anything.

Sorry it is quite long once I start typing I don’t seem to stop just any advice would be greatly appreciated.