Gee,

It sounds like he is/was a good friend that you have strong feelings for.  That’s OK.  You don’t have to put a label on it.  You don’t have to act on it.  You can just be OK by feeling those good feelings for him and leave it at that.

He is not physically in your life anymore.  He never was romantically available since he is married.

You can try by doing sitting meditations around your strong feelings and really be in touch with your emotions and where it shows up in your body.  And just sit with that.  It is easier to let go when you are willing to sit with it.

You can even have a little mantra when you do this like “May he be safe. May he be happy.  May he be well.  I let him go so he can be those things.”

What do you think?

Mark