Dear Derek:

I wonder if you read my reply before or after some changes I made in it?

Regarding the complication in your studies in Spain and the thought of moving back to the UK- I hope not because from my understanding and feel  of it, you have a wonderful partner in Spain and I see that as a great, huge plus, exceptional. I wouldn’t like you to give it up or leave it behind. I therefore hope you can find an academic solution to  the problem and stay with your partner.

Regarding your partner’s surprise English exam- I didn’t understand it all (it is getting to the time of the day when I am  getting tired…), aim at loving him as he is and encourage him to become more of what he already is, not something that he is not. And when you feel sad for him, you are probably feeling sad for yourself, so maybe you can make a shift from feeling sad for him to feeling sad for you.

Regarding the straight man at work- you felt “hot and nervous”- that is anxiety, fear. The fear associated with education, your own and your partner’s. We discussed it some. If you want we can talk about it more. And having crushes, no big deal, as far as I am concerned. You are a young man, it happens.

Soon will be away from the computer for about sixteen hours. Take care.

anita