Thanks for the advice Anita! Much deeper than what I found on Reddit and other internet places.

The only thing she said negative about me was that she thought I was a bit of a pushover. I explained to her that after I studied meditation through Hinduism and Buddhism and I became more docile and tried not to let my temper get the best of me, she seemed to accept that answer because I recently discovered she takes spirituality really seriously. She said I was “Cool as a cucumber” and didn’t let stress bother me lol.

We had a conversation about her not wanting to hang out all the time and based on her texting pattern she doesn’t want to text too often either. She wants her space and enjoys alone time. I can deal with that and I’ve learned to only text her once or twice a week. She gives little hints like that and I’ve been trying to catch on and adapt. For patience, I don’t think that’s a problem. Besides, it actually gives us something to talk about as we catch up.

It’s been a few months now and she is still the only one that really has my attention, so maybe I’ll just bring up in our next conversation that I would like to hang out more just to spend time together every once in awhile and see how things go. She really likes sports, so maybe I’ll ask if she wants to get tickets to a basketball game…

I’m not sure how to word it so that we can actually talk and move things forward though. She won’t call, she hates phone calls from everyone. Already tried it. :/

I hate trying to date and get to know people now. It’s all so complicated and the process of relearning and starting over has become tiresome. Most women say they like guys with confidence but its hard to stay that way when things are always so confusing.

I don’t know if I should be more aggressive and assertive, or if I need to back up and give her space to do her own thing as she figures out what she wants.  The way we talk in person is more comical and fun, but through text its serious and sometimes basic and boring. Sometimes its hard to tell if she just isn’t interested or really busy. Once I thought she wasn’t feeling the conversation, then she replied and said she was at an event at church and was helping someone navigate there.

I can’t tell if I’m overthinking it and she really is just busy, or if she is slowly flaking on me because she isn’t feeling me. When I try to ask she avoids the questions… this is weird because as I said above, she normally is really  blunt and doesn’t sugar coat things. It’s like she’s become afraid to just say what she wants to say? Maybe she doesn’t want to hurt me? It’s out of character for her…

Day to day it isn’t so bad because I can distract myself with work in the mornings, but on my free time I think about her a lot and now start to miss her since I can’t see her at work anymore. Normally that leads to me questioning if I should keep chasing her or try to move on.

I don’t think telling her that I miss her will make her want to hang out with me, it seems like a bad move…

But I suppose it is affecting me by bottling it all up, and that is what led me here because I feel like I’m becoming frustrated by all of it. I don’t really know what to do for my next move though, whatever it is I am forced to do it through text since I can’t see her in person right now.

As for how long its been affecting me, I think it all started when I sent her a new year moving into 2018, after she replied we slowly started texting again leading up to Valentines 2018, that’s when we really opened up to each other emotionally.

So, roughly the past 3  months?  We worked together for 9 months, but it will be a year of us talking at the start of April.

I’ll send her a text tomorrow afternoon and see if we can reschedule our get-together and hangout over the weekend.

Maybe I can get her to show up and we can talk in person. Spark a conversation to see if we can make it a regular thing and see how she responds…