Dear kris:

Your father should not be burdening you with his depression. Your life should not be about his depression. It should be about you, about your engineering, about your future career and about your new relationship.. about the new and what is in front of you, not about the old, about what (should be) behind you.

I was hoping that your father had your best interest in mind (previous thread), but reading more here that he exposed you to a lot of verbal aggression at home, for years, and then, once you are out, putting the guilt trip on you, I am less optimistic about his priorities.

In other words, reads to me that his priority is his feelings, not yours.

Perhaps you can attend quality psychotherapy so to make the transition work for you, the transition between the way life was and the way you can wisely choose your life to be.

anita