Dear Strillit:

What caused him to break up with you, if you would like to explore this, I suggest you attend to the following:

1. Those “up and downs” during the 3.5 year relationship that you mentioned. If you elaborate on those ups and downs, what were they about, was there a common theme to the downs, were there arguments, loud voices, silent treatments… and how were they resolved, it may be very telling.

2. Recently, since January of this year, the two of you were talking about moving together. What was discussed regarding finances, as money can be part of what motivated him to break up with you. Perhaps another topic related to the planned living-together.

3. Even more recently, February of this year, you met his family. For the first time. Why not before, I wonder. Anything you know about the relationship between your ex boyfriend and his parents?

anita