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Desperately lonely and ashamed

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  • April 17, 2018 at 2:51 pm #202895
    NADIA
    Participant

    Can anyone else relate?  Alone for 20 years, huge trust  issues.  But need source of nurturing.  Connection?  After a year long journey I thought I had found that in a spiritual group, it ended badly.  I hate feeling like I’m always the cause, blame, wrong.  Is there really such thing as “perfect love and perfect trust”? Unconditional love?  Just struggling and I don’t have many people to relate to..thanks for just listening!

    April 17, 2018 at 5:44 pm #202915
    Mark
    Participant

    NADIA,

    I would rather bring the questions down to more real life examples of “perfect love and trust.”  I would rather start with loving and trusting.. bit by bit with individuals.  It sounds like you need practice in developing trusting relationships.  Perhaps looping in a counselor or therapist to help you navigate how you “do” relationships.

    We all need nurturing relationships for that is human.  Start small with casual friendship(s) and work your way up from there.

     

    Mark

    April 17, 2018 at 6:17 pm #202927
    NADIA
    Participant

    I appreciate you response,

    I spent a year slowly  forming these relationships  and with a counselor weekly….

    April 17, 2018 at 7:49 pm #202931
    Mark
    Participant

    NADIA,

    What I do is to find places and activities where I meet people where I can connect on some similar level.  Start a casual conversation and go from there.  If there is a mutual interest (not necessarily romantic) then make an arrangement to meet again for further activity and/or conversation.  No agenda.  Nothing more than just further conversation to see where this lead, whether casual friendship or more.  It’s the journey (or relating, connecting, conversation), not the destination.

    Mark

    April 18, 2018 at 7:45 am #202987
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Dear NADIA:

    Would you like to elaborate on your sentence: “I hate feeling like I’m always the cause, blame, wrong”- how long did you feel this way; when did you start feeling this way, in what circumstances?

    anita

    April 19, 2018 at 7:52 am #203177
    Anonymous
    Guest

    * didn’t reflect under Topics

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