I don’t know.  I’m kind of hurt.  hurt about learning about myself.  Feels like i’ve had to learn a lot about myself in the last week or so.  Very difficult hearing all this about my self.  I’ve learned that i’m somewhat of a drama queen that needs attention?  AM i right?

I’m really torn.  I guess i’m scared to be honest.   I want to do like anita says.  Just call her and be to the point, not pleading or begging.  Just ask her if she will consider trying again and accepting what she says respectfully.  But i’m afraid.  For one, i don’t know if nowIf she says yes, am i setting myself up for heartbreak again, or ??  and if she says yes, what about my friends.  None of them care for her or have any respect for her anymore.  Would be tough.  Although i know i need to do what i need for me, not anyone else.

If she says no, then i will be hurt again, but at least i will know that this road has ended and there is no point in trying anymore. and i won’t have this what if feeling anymore.  Maybe it would be the absolute closure i need to move on…

Now is just finding the right time to ask.  I know she has been dealing with some more shit lately.