- This topic has 10 replies, 4 voices, and was last updated 6 years ago by Alia.
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September 28, 2018 at 9:18 pm #228049AliaParticipant
I posted recently about losing my job and being depressed by it. Things have been improving – I’ve been spending my downtime being productive and keeping my mind (and hands) occupied. Until night, that is, but that’s a whole separate post.
What I’ve been considering lately during the time I should be sleeping…. is starting my own business. It’s really been something that I keep coming back to but I’m not sure if it’s the best thing for me. (I am still continuing to apply for jobs while I consider it. I still need an income to support myself and my family).
I know starting your own business is risky. The business I’m considering, though, would be relatively low cost to start up. (Startup fees could be less than a hundred dollars). I would love to be my own boss and work from home. Set my own hours, do my own thing. I could save money on commuting, etc. I would have greater freedom in my life and with my choices.
But, the down side. I’d be responsible for my own success/failure. I would have to really hustle to get the business off the ground (and then keep it afloat). I would have to learn the ins and outs of being a business owner. (Taxes, etc.) I would have to get my butt in gear and actually buckle down and work hard, harder than I’ve had to in my whole life.
I just can’t shake the feeling that this might be a good idea for me, though. I’ve only mentioned this to a handful of people. One or two are supportive. The other question my sanity.
What do you guys think? Is it too risky opening a business?
September 29, 2018 at 8:57 am #228101AnonymousGuestDear Alia:
There is always a risk starting a business. The good part is that the startup is not a lot of money, but there will be a lot of work put into it, that kind of investment, maybe more money invested along the way.
Your lack of confidence in your abilities, one that you expressed in the previous thread, is a problem and will be a problem if and when you embark on starting a business. You will need to prepare for it and manage it. Lots of small businesses fail, but if yours fails, you will consider it (will you not?) another personal failure. And it may not at all fail, if it does, because of something you would do wrong.
So, yes, part of the business plan would have to be planning for your emotional well-being as you go about it.
anita
September 29, 2018 at 12:26 pm #228145AliaParticipantYou are right. I would have to plan for that sort of thing. Honestly that’s a big part of why I haven’t done it so far. I just fear not being able to find anything, and my family suffering for my issues. But right now even taking on something new and making mistakes has paralyzed me. My last employer really didn’t do my confidence any favors.
September 30, 2018 at 11:41 am #228271AnonymousGuestDear Alia:
You mentioned your family in a previous thread as well as in your recent post: “my family suffering for my issues”. You mentioned in an earlier post that you are in your early forties. I am wondering if by family you mean parents/ siblings, your original family, that is (not husband/ children). Maybe your sense of responsibility toward your parents (if I am correct in my assumption that this is the family you referred to) is dragging you down. Maybe a sense of over-responsibility is and has been making your life very difficult.
When I believed that every choice I made regarding money/ employment was a choice that greatly affected my mother, that I owed her… that made every such choice very difficult to make and “making mistakes has paralyzed me” as well. Is this the case for you too, feeling the burden of financial responsibility for parent/s?
anita
November 13, 2018 at 9:55 am #236715AliaParticipantNo, my parents are self sufficient and don’t need help. But my decisions do affect others, and one of those is a small child. She’s already being affected by my issues at the present and that is really hurting me. It’s one thing for me to be down but it’s unacceptable(to me) for her to suffer.
I just feel lost and anxious. I’m doing all that I know to do (apply as much as possible, make the most in interviews) but it’s still not clicking. I just want to do the best that I can and make my life the best that I can. I have no one that I can talk to about this in my daily life. No close female friends, no mother, no one. And those I do talk to just do the “you’re awesome, don’t let it get you down.” I just need someone to really bounce ideas off of. I feel if I was “awesome” I wouldn’t be where I am. I’m very frustrated, anxious, and alone.
November 13, 2018 at 10:47 am #236723AnonymousGuestDear Alia:
This small child, “already being affected by (your) issues”, if this is a small child, maybe a little girl who is living with you, then she needs much more than your money. She needs your calm, the calm in your voice as you talk to her, in your eyes and smile as you look at her, in your touch as you put her to bed at night. Aim at calm for her sake.
For that purpose of calm, I think it is better that you find employment as an employee, make enough money to pay off your debt and sustain shelter, food, medical care, the necessities. With your anxiety, better not start a business, I think, or anything freelance. Better have a routine, a schedule and a paycheck at the end of the week or month.
If your concern is the well being of this child, then outside of providing for bare necessities, the best you can do for her is appear calm, and encourage her to do things for herself, be it small things, to achieve, to make things happen in her young life, a cleaning chore or a cooking task. Praise her for job well done, give her the sense that she is adequate and successful in her endeavors. If you do that, there will be no one more awesome in her life.
anita
November 13, 2018 at 7:15 pm #236771AliaParticipantI try to hide my anxiety and be calm around her. I don’t want her to be in any further pain for me. But if I don’t find a job I won’t have anywhere to tuck her in. While it wouldn’t happen immediately, if I don’t find one soon I fear I will lose all that I have and there is nowhere for me to go. I am lucky that my parents would take her in, at least.
- This reply was modified 6 years ago by Alia.
November 13, 2018 at 7:45 pm #236775AliaParticipantI feel I should stress this is the absolute worst that could happen but probably wouldn’t. It’s just always at the back of my mind and causes me anxiety. I’m doing everything in my power to prevent this from becoming reality.
November 14, 2018 at 5:13 am #236799AireneParticipantHello Alia,
I skimmed through some of the responses, so this might have already been mentioned. Is there a way you can work on building this business while continuing to work in a stable job? I’m all for someone going into business for themselves, but what I’ve found is that for most people who are in business for themselves, it is a gradual process.
If you are able to work even part-time while building your business, it will provide a safety net for you, and that might give you some reassurance.
Just my thoughts.
Best of luck,
Airene
November 14, 2018 at 1:51 pm #236873AliaParticipantI have applied to over 100 jobs with no success. I’m pretty much done.
November 14, 2018 at 4:44 pm #236885OliviaParticipantMistakes are … going to happen, and how you deal with them and learn from them is really one of the major keys to success. If you can balance limiting your mistakes, learning from them and moving forward as soon as possible, then I think you can truly be dangerous.
January 20, 2019 at 6:13 pm #275885SusieParticipantHello Alia,
I too am starting my own business. It is scary. I do have a full time job, I have to support myself as there is no one else in my life.Mine is a web biz ourtime2thrive.com.
I’m curious what your is. You have not shared.
It takes a lot of courage to start a business, do not let self doubt stop you! If it feels right I say go for it! What is the worst that can happen?
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