Dear Feathering:

I am losing focus and soon will be away from the computer, but I want  to give you some  feedback on your recent  post sooner than later, knowing you plan on seeing him this weekend.

I agree  with your list of what not to do. Regarding what you are  not sure about: none of these is a good idea  except maybe telling him you lost your voice. Regarding the list  of what you are sure about: I think you listed too many things, better take  off things from the list. I would limit the list to the following:

“- Admit to having an issue with anger and  own it…- Explain I am willing to discuss the details…(one or two instances may be enough, continue to second or third if  he shows interest, and apologize)

– However, that’s my role and  I am only half of this (I would say part-of-it instead of half-of-it. I will also not expect him to reciprocate there and then and list his contributions to the troubles in the relationship, not would  I pressure him to do that…   bad idea!)

I will not include the “I need a partner who  understands etc.” no, no, no. This is not the time for that, too early, may never be  the  time.

And not a good idea  to ask about the other woman. I think overall you are planning way too much. Limit your objectives and even more, your expectations for this meeting. Talk way less and  listen more, pay attention to what he says, hear  his voice instead of what you want  to say next.

Regarding the gift, I so appreciate it, but I want to maintain my record of zero material benefit to my  participation here.

anita