Tanya

I am so happy to see that you are able and willing to take some self stock and introspection. It’s really going to help you move past that mistrust of men. And I get it. My wife damaged my trust many years ago. It festered and I thought I was over it, but every time she did something that was a precursor to that violation, I jumped on it. Mostly not because I thought she was violating that trust again, but rather that I had ignored signs before that something was up, assuring myself I was overthinking it, or my mind was just running amok. I had learned to trust her again, but the wound was just too great in the end. We ended up never talking about it. I tried to act like it never happened but when those instances came up, she took it as an attack on her. Both of our unwillingness to stop and take some time to just speak to one another about a rather important issue cost me my marriage this week.

So if I can stop that from happening for one other person, to stop this pain and suffering that is completely avoidable, then I will. Again, remind yourself that he is not those men. Talk to him about what happened to you. If he does things that remind you about those men and what they did, ask him about it. But realize that too much of that will make him think that you believe he is just another one of those men. And that might spell the end as well.