Dear John:

About a week ago, on this page of your thread, you wrote that you met a woman (not your current girlfriend) sometime after the ending of the relationship with your ex and  you forgot all about your ex. You wrote: “there was someone that I did briefly date that did well for herself. was very active (did  things/ trips on weekend) and her child was 17… When I was talking to her, all thoughts  of my ex faded out very fast,  I got that excitement I did have  with my  ex… I only went out with her a couple times”-

It is in your words, right there. You need a girlfriend who does not have young children to take care  of and who  has enough money and time to have fun activities with you, trips on weekends and such.

In the past I went deep into your childhood and your attachment  to your  mother  having  been activated, but keeping it simple at this  point, simply stated, you want  to have fun.

You don’t want the following: “me being a full time single dad to  her kids.. I end up resentful. Like when we do get time together,  I’m done.. I’m done being a dad to all the kids, I just want to  play and do me”.

Keeping it  simple, you don’t want  to be a dad or a caretaker to young children. You want to have fun with a woman who does not have young  children and who is able to do fun things in weekends with you. When you have a girlfriend  like this, who is of course nice to you, affectionate, then you will forget all about your ex again, just like you did before, don’t  you think?

anita