Dear Nazar:

You are welcome.

You wrote: “As per her she is independent and can walk away from an ex without using her new boyfriend as an excuse”-

So she is expressing her independence of him by hiding  the fact that she  has a boyfriend from him so that he doesn’t think that her decision to not have a relationship with him is based on a boyfriend influence on her, and she is expressing her independence  from you by letting you know she is going to keep that friendship no matter your response… and she has been involved with a  man so much older than her, 49, twenty years older.

I am wondering if she is stuck in asserting her independence from her parents- it can be an ongoing limbo situation, her projecting her  parent/s into the man in her life and then … rebelling against the supposed authority of the  man who is a representative of her parent.

Do you know anything about her relationships with her parents, past and present?

anita