Suzanne,

If he decided to stay in touch with his ex-gf then that proves that having that break is a good thing for the both of you.  You will know definitely that he cannot give her up and using you as the “safety” gf.

I would have no contact for 6 months or more to give him that space so he can find himself (whether that is with his ex or not).  Having no contact will keep his confusion from causing confusion with you since the more you two talk, the more confused you get.

Let him have the time and space to figure things out for himself and with his ex.  As you said,  he wants to figure out things on his own and take his time.

Mark