Hi Ashley,

I’ve both worked with, managed and known many people in your situation with similar achievements. As such, one thing I would say – there tend to be two camps, there are those who tend not to mention them and you find out almost by accident one day some of the amazing things they have done and those who like to bring them centre-stage, here, this is me and all I have done.  The second way can very easily come across as condescending even if not meant as such. I suspect that when you go to your Casbah area, you are not talking about these achievements, you are simply being yourself – i.e. more like the first camp of people.

To me, it sounds like you are using your achievements as a bit of a shield against insecurity still held that you don’t actually fit at this club, often the way with people who have had to fight hard for them in a group of people who have perhaps gained them more easily, more naturally part of the “club” ( right schools, connections, holidays you know what I mean here ).  There is absolutely nothing wrong with a healthy debate – but it involves listening as much as talking, being open yourself to change, not simply looking to prove others wrong, however right you believe your own logical arguments/points to be.

Sound at all familiar?