From this point on, if you trust yourself (title of this thread) to not reconnect with your mother and father, if you trust yourself to not connect with anyone who harms you or is likely to harm you, if you trust yourself to take good care of yourself, to know what is best to do in the future, under various circumstances, then you will feel that you can endure the emotions you are resisting.

You will be able to feel soft toward yourself, your husband… and even toward your mother, which is what happened to me. I resisted feeling any love for my mother, until recently, I felt safe enough to feel that love. I really didn’t want to, but I had to, because it was always there, innate (your word, innate). I felt it but only after I promised myself to never have her in my life again. These very days I am practicing relaxing into emotions that have puzzled me for so long.

Dear Anita,

I trust all of that, every word.  I do not know how to begin being soft towards my mother – as I know it is not something I can immediately activate, that the softness will develop over time.  I think I need to begin with softness towards myself and husband. Perhaps start there. What do you think?

I do absolutely absolutely know I do not want my parents in my life, and I trust myself and am proud of my ability to only allow good non toxic humans in my personal life. I have been doing a good job at protecting my spirit getting rid of the glitter and fluff, only focusing on the real and true.  I am proud of my circle and my place in this world.

i know that I am ready to be a “real adult” and that is having power – power to choose.

I am ready Anita to choose softness, I notice a shift already – my husband has showed softness to me as you know – we are re developing trust. I will work on this…