Yes,  I can only truly be loyal to someone if I respect their views and since I don’t, I am being dishonest even in being loyal.

This is my last decision- nobody should know anything unless I want to tell them.  And I don’t. Even with my parents.

I want to share something here.  I always knew that I wanted to love and marry by my choice and I also know that to do that I need to assert my place by doing something worthwhile.  So,  getting a job and at least getting one novel published even if it is not very great was on my list.  I absolutely cannot settle with my dreams and thus this plan works out everything effectively and yes, I will not fight and for his current feelings,  I think I will let him calm himself down. He is going through a lot even outside the relationship.

Thank you so much Anita. It is always a pleasure to receive advice from you.  I am thankful for you to be present in my life.