Dear Cali Chica:

No team work in your mother’s mind and life. Team work is foolish and naïve. When interacting with any other person, you either Win or you Lose. Her motto- win at all costs. She won the war with your father and he has been her shadow for years.

Always at war, never Together; always Win/Lose, never Win/Win. This is why if you ever did reconnect with your mother, a Together will not be possible, and it will be indeed “naïve and foolish” on your part to ever imagine such a possibility. So, being present in her life, you have to continue the war, or submit, like your father.

Being not in contact with her, you still have her voice that keeps you at war.

You are in the process of resurrecting your own voice, paying attention to your  own voice, listening, sitting and listening.

anita