Dear Lily:

It wasn’t rude of you to knock on her door the way you did. It would be rude to knock many times and/ or very loudly, but it is okay to knock a couple of times, as in knock-knock-knock, pause, then again, knock-knock-knock.

It is not rude to not like her (nor is it rude to feel anything at all that you feel). Not liking a person rude to you motivates you to not look for their company, which is the healthy thing to do.

If I was you, I will leave the glue with a note in her letterbox. After that, I wouldn’t ask her if she received it or mention the happening to anyone. In the future doing laundry, if this happens again, you don’t need to contact the owner of the rack and go through any of this, because it is an acceptable practice for roommates to use each other’s rack, and yours was used by someone else. Yours was damaged just a bit by someone else before, so when a stick breaks, but the rack is still usable, it is okay to say nothing and do nothing about it.

“I can have compassion with myself, that I didn’t do everything perfectly”- excellent. When you practice this and other people witness it, they will feel more comfortable themselves, to not do everything perfectly.

anita