Dear Anita,

After reading your advice about two weeks ago, i gain a bit of confident when u said “You are one of many millions of men and women today who are upset  about this or that aspect  of their bodies. Keep this bigger picture in mind. Look around you and notice other people and how upset so many of them are about their bodies. This will change your I-am-the-only-one perspective”. It really help relieving my upset mindset.

But that confidence broke and im feel upset again as i saw one of my junior which is way much younger than me (like 6 years younger; she’s 14), she’s a girl and she has the same height as me now. I’m really upset as right now i know the fact that most girls around here will always be in the same height as me. When i saw her at the mall i’m taller because im wearing tall shoes (like 3 cm taller). But actually i know that we have the same height. And she went out with lots of girls and all have the same height as her. I’m really down that time that why can’t i have 3 cm more on me, as with only that 3 cm i’ll already have it easier in many aspects of my life. And I also notice that most boys who’s way younger than me are growing taller than me, even the shortest among most boys that i saw will slightly taller than me. I know i should think that many people are upset at their bodies, but its just that most people around here are not concerning of their heights as most of them reach their genders’ average height.

I’m also afraid that when i wear shoes i’ll be slightly taller than average girls, for example my friends. They’ll saw me taller, but im always insecure to go their houses as i’ll have to take off the shoes/sandals. Im also thought about if i have a girlfriend , their parents might not accept me if they saw their daughter going out with same height boy, because majority here and not that short.

I know that me complaining on these are useless. But i just cant heal my mindset, as this is something irreversible and im a person who likes to compare with other person, and i dont wanna lose. When i thought about my height, i have already lost and it really hurt me, as i’m lost on something that is not even my fault. Some of my friends who have shorter parents (even shorter than me) and they are taller than me, most people said that height is according to genetics, and i really cant get it. I even thought that if im in this height i prefer to be born as a woman, maybe this is the reason that im also jealous of that girl that rejected me (the one that i wrote on my previous post). I guess i really need advice for this screwed up mindset haha.