For Anita: about my parents and my boyfriend, it’s a funny thing. My mom thinks he’s probably a B, and has judged him SO MUCH about the London thing (and I had to defend him over and over even if I was secretly heart-broken about the London thing, but I had to protect him anyway from her judgement). My dad really likes him. But in that dynamic I described, it was really my mom who did all the judging and pressuring and asking for ‘excellence’. My dad has always been much more relaxed about things.