Here is an update:
Him: I don’t want to leave you nor do I want conflict. Today I was thinking about you and working so I was in the middle. I miss you and I don’t want us to be hurt but then again we have trouble understanding each other, believing each other, and also being happy with each other. I’m truly conflicted cause I will always love you but I hate having to feel the pressure of you being upset as if I was gonna hang with friends or what not
Me: but i was never upset about any that :/ I’m just really sad and I miss you and I don’t want to do this where we’re both angry or at odds with each other
Him: I don’t know how we can truly make things work tho
Me: wait so do u think time will fix all of this
Him: I love you to the point were I would be willing to take time to completely improve myself so I can properly treat you right dude it hurts me so much I can’t make you happy or have a positive impact on you I just want you to be happy I need to be able to be happy with you and not doubt each other
Me: But u do make me happy though :/ why can’t we improve ourselves together though, isn’t that the whole point of growing together 🙁
Him: I wish it was as easy as that I wish I can fix everything rn but my underlying fears will always get in front
Me: I don’t want to take a break tho 🙁 I want to be with u
Him: I want to be with you so badly I just don’t know how to make things work rn because of what we’ve been through
Me: but 🙁 i’m very sad, I miss you a lot, and I don’t want for us to be like this anymore. I want to be okay with you, okay with us. I want things to become easy between us. i want to make your life easier, not difficult 🙁

that was about 40 min ago, he hasn’t opened it yet