Hi Inky, thx for reply.

Yes, you’re right. I kinda felt that in a way she’s being angry at me for something which isn’t our fault. But I can see why after having 3 failed relationships (perhaps mine is the 4th) citing parents issues caused by status will make anyone go crazy (my last conversation with her proves my point). I’m also saddened by the fact that perhaps all her exes never go all the way for her. She even mocked me by challenging me if I’m ready to give up everything just for her which actually doesn’t have to be that way because I’m confident I can convince my parents to give us a chance. Me being thrown out of the family is pretty much nonsense because I know my parents love me too much and I’m the only sole heir to the company. Besides, me and her decided to live in a different house away from my parents anyway if we do get married. Making a mountain out of a mole hill if I can say.

Marriage is a discussion for another day because we have yet to really spend enough time together. But we do share marriage in the same view. We just want to get married in a simple way. Maybe along the beach with a nice view with just a few family members and close friends as witnesses followed by nice party meal enough for all topped with recorded music. As Indonesian Chinese, weddings here can be crazy excessive. Renting huge ballrooms, inviting every fucking person you know on the continent, lavish restaurant meals for every starving children in Africa that can last for months, over the top musical bands, list goes on. I’ve seen it all.

The child might be the only issue. I’ve researched about the outcome of children from single mum backgrounds and the claims are not so looking positive. But I’ve yet to see her daughter so it’s a question for another day. All I know her daughter lived with her ex in-laws, she see her once a week (I think), and she’s a tough & strict mum. The daughter is supported financially by her biological dad who is working in Australia. We’ve yet to discuss much about her daughter about everything else. Although I noticed something weird. She wanted her daughter to live with us then the next day she says she will let her daughter decide where to live because she’s afraid of shocking her from moving out of her ex in-laws suddenly. Makes sense but weird at the same time.

Yes, perhaps it’s a blessing in disguise, because it’s said that every failed relationship is just a path to the next better one. Truth be told, I think it’s true because she’s the best girl compared to anyone I’ve gotten into relationship with. I’m just saddened by the fact that it didn’t last long despite everything. But also perhaps it’s also my curse to be unable to have proper lasting relationships all my life because this is probably my 4th failed relationship. That and the fact I can never find anyone better than her locally (met her online) because I taught myself to not settle for less. I used dating app for a reason and I’m not gonna use it again.