Anita,

I’m always shocked at how much work you put into your posts. I am shocked that anyone would take that much time out of their day to focus on me in such detail. I truly appreciate it. To be honest I don’t post here as often anymore because i feel like you work harder than i do on my own problems and that makes me feel guilty that i have made such little progress with myself in the years i have posted here. However i am very grateful you give me and others who post here that level of attention.

It’s hard for me to read through these post’s sometimes knowing i come back here with the same problems time after time and seem to go nowhere with it. My lack of progress is making me feel hopeless.

I understand my mom did a poor job of loving me. Believe me when i  say im not waiting up for it either. I don’t know if it’s really doing me any good giving my attention to that relationship anymore. Not saying she and my father didn’t have a profoundly negative impact on my self worth, i just don’t know what to do with the information that my parents loved me conditionally anymore.

I really would just like to get my needs met at this point and it feels hopeless after putting so much effort year after year. i mean maybe im not trying my best i dont know.