Thank you TeaK,

It’s a battle every day. I fight for survival. I have to come to the terms of not having my own kids, not having my own family, not having anyone of my own to create memories with. Every time I see, hear or get reminded of kids, my heart breaks. It’s the biggest loss in my life. I have to realize that there will be no one at my deathbed. I have to realize that I will be alone, miserable, and forgotten. I wish I could go back in time and change things.

I don’t know what to do if the therapy doesn’t work. I’m so terrified of the unknown. 8th of May was supposed to be the end for me. If it wasn’t for all the support and kind words and guidance from all of you, I wouldn’t be here now. How to bounce back, to “heal” myself seems impossible.