Hi Ivygrl!

Sorry I’ve been busy for a few days. I made a mental note to reply to you, forgot and finally remembered again today! Well done on entering a contest. That was very brave of you. I’m glad that your artwork got many likes. I’m sure in the future you will be able to win. Keep up the good work practicing.

Regarding your questions about subconscious and conscious.

There are things that your conscious mind believes.

Then there are subconscious emotional beliefs.

For example, throughout childhood my subconscious absorbed a message that “I am not good enough” and formed a belief around it. My conscious mind as an adult knows this isn’t true.

What kinds of thoughts make you feel upset and want to give up?

Fortunately, there are things you can do to change subconscious beliefs and make them easier to deal with.

Keeping a gratitude diary is important. Writing down when people compliment you and keeping a list of that is important. There have been many compliments in this thread. Finally, learning to challenge negative conscious thoughts is important. Whilst validation from others helps, they cannot change your beliefs about yourself. Only you can do that.

In time you will learn that negative thoughts aren’t necessarily true and be able to see them for what they are without being upset by them. Mindfulness is a skill many people practice to help with this.

Please see an example of how to challenge negative thoughts below:

“I’m not good enough.”

What does being a good person mean?

What does being a bad person mean?

What historically has made me feel this way? What is the context of the current situation that made me feel this way? Is there another way to look at the situation? What would I say to my best friend if they were in a similar situation?

To address this negative thought, I would keep a list of all of the good things I do and the good things I like about myself and add 1 or 2 things to it every day. These good things can start out small.

I held a door for someone.

I cheered up my friend.

I picked up someone’s keys and returned them when they dropped them.

I try to be kind and caring to others.

I am intelligent.

I try my best to work hard.