Dear Tobi:

You are welcome. “Somehow I became so calm right now… I hope I didn’t turn cold-hearted” – calm does not mean cold. When a person is calm, a person is able to love more, not less.

“I still care about her. Could someone change moods so quickly?” – yes. It is in the nature of moods to change. Your calm mood will change too. Maybe it already changed by the time you read this sentence.

“And yeah, she’s really thoughtful and honest. She likes helping people in need” – good to read this.

“I never forced her to do anything against her will as I want to be equal and not become a control freak” – you are a good man.

“My gf and my friends said I have that f**** vibe. Idk what makes them think so” – ask them what makes them think so.

“The only thing I remember about my parents’ breakup is that I would defend my mom when my dad tried to abuse her, which includes times that I had to fight him for physically abusing my mom” – maybe part of your love for the woman we are discussing is that like your mom, she was abused by an ex, and you feel the need to help her and defend her, like you defended your mom (?)

anita