Dear anita,

Also there’s something I’d like ur opinion on this issue, as I’m going to meet her tomorrow…. Should I tell her that I once approached a person on social media..“- no, because your fears are based on a series of future events that may not happen: (1) the girl you are dating didn’t yet announce the relationship on social media and told you that she is not ready to do that yet, (2) if and when she posts about the relationship on social media, her sister’s close friend may not remember that you flirted with her and/ or may not say anything about, (3) If the close friend tells the sister of the girl you are dating, the sister may not say anything about it, (4) If she did, the girl you are dating may not think much about it and may not say anything about it to you.

“Or should I just let it go“- yes, let it go for now- if you can. Think about it again later,  if (and after) the events I referred in the #1, 2, 3 and 4, above happen.. if they happen.

= i’d like to continue our discussion regarding this issue….

My explanations might be a bit confusing…

Dont you think that i need to prepare for the worst?

Like maybe those 1-4 scenarios didnt happen,

but a 5th scenario might happen….

In which the sister told her, or maybe some kind of circumstance causes her to know i once approach one of her sister’s best friend… and her sister advices her to stay away from me as i’m considered some kind of “playboy” who texts many girls and i’ve hurted her best friend…. Which resulting in that girl whom i date now to be disappointed in me… and lost her feelings for me….

or maybe a 6th scenario

In which her sister’s future husband has a close friend, one of them is my former neighbour who moved away a month ago, he is quite a gossip type of guy… so i used to ask him which girl should i chase first? Girl A (the one i left after texting for about two months) or Girl B (the one im dating now)… so i decided to text girl A first and after about two months i stopped,

and i told him how i stop (i really regret this…)… it is due to that girl A’s father has more than 2 wives (polygamy) then that former neighbour of mine laughs and tell me “who you are dating? The father or the girl?” Why ‘d u concern with her father… I also stop to text that girl because i find her unattractive (she’s more chubby than i imagined (im being honest here))….

So in this 6th scenario, i feat that gossip guy might told his close friend (future husband of the sister)… and that future husband might told the sister and the sister told the girl im dating with… that i have a bad personality in which i judge a girl due to her father has many wives (polygamy)… and also due to she’s more chubby than i imagine….

I even told the girl im dating now that if she gains weight i’ll still love her… and i really do… but if that 6th scenario happen… she might not trust me….

How i wish i can change those past mistakes of mine…. I’d be really devastated if she’s disappointed in me due to those two scenarios… i really really want to cherish her….

I really want to improve my relationship with her, without being disrupted by my past mistakes….

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it feels wonderful to hear and to believe these words, doesn’t it?

= yes it does, i hope what she said is really genuine and true…

I have learned that when a person has no self-worth, or too little of it, the person cannot love another person well, not for long.

= i want to love her for a long time…. I’ve been waiting all this time to meet this type of girl….

she (the girl you are dating) has probably been telling her parents and older sister- for some time now-  that you are a good guy and that you cherish her.

= i hope so… cause i really wanna cherish her, i dont wanna make her sad… i want to do my best for her….

I hope that by that time you will change your attitude regarding (1) the inevitability of making mistakes: everyone makes mistakes, including her parents, her sister, her sister’s future husband, the waiters at the restaurant where you will be having dinner… and everyone else, (2) being gentle and patient with yourself instead of being harsh and impatient.

= i will try to stay calm at that time…. I hope my mind is really in a good state that time, cause it could affect how i’ll communicate later on… i hope i can give a good impression to her sister and her future husband, as well as a better impression to her parents and brother….

Wish me luck…..

practice talking to her parents out loud, you can do so when you are alone. And remember, be harsh and impatient with yourself, and you will fail; be gentle and patient with yourself, and you will succeed

= im pretty sure the next time i meet her parents, i’ll talk more… maybe not too much, but definitely gonna be more communicative than the first meeting….
I also told that her “please give me more time, i’ll adapt and talk more to your parents”… and she said to me relax… dont pressure yourself… you have all the time you want….. when she said that im really happy…. More grateful to have met a girl like her, i dont want to disappoint her…