<p class=”p1″>I do agree I took a bit of the personality of my father. He probably suppressed( ignored) his own emotions to a point where he could only explode or not feeling anything, nothing in between. I also think while others are being vulnerable, it made him very uncomfortable because he needed to be vulnerable( to an extend) to understand or communicate with that person, aka facing his own vulnerability. He only knew how to shut it down by rejecting it. I got his stubborness and jugdemental problem when i was younger, but i worked hard to change it once i realized where mine came from</p>
<p class=”p1″>i do not think i overreact normally,initially yes, when things were unsure and turbulent. I feel she imprinted that image of me being over sensitive when we started dating . i have changed a great deal but her impression remains.</p>
<p class=”p1″>in fact most of the time when i am at home with her, i am very silly and funny. i tried to let that part of me out, and that part i dont let it out too often.  but somehow, i can still sense she is very cautious of what i say and tip toe. it is as if she needs to “deal” with me, so she acts in a certain way or do certain things. </p>
<p class=”p1″>she could go travel with fd for a week, and i didnt comment anything at all other than i miss her( but if someone is tired of you i guess that makes them uncomfortable still) . i guess i felt her uncomfortable, and that made me feel i overreacted and so i tried not to say much, i do ocassionally overreact as you said, when i didnt express myself enough. but in retrospect, It was not that serious honestly, at least until before she didnt respond to my question on whether she likes me or not.</p>
<p class=”p1″>one thing that she mentioned she liked about me, was how kind i was. i am empathetic and try to understand. she said i brought her new perspective and i am someone whom she typically does not interact with, it is as if i gave her another world to be in. </p>
<p class=”p1″>i get what anita says, with suppressed emotions, because they arent regulated well, it felt like a suddent pump of air to the chest, to a point i didnt know what how to deal. </p>
<p class=”p1″>i do lack the habit of expressing. i think i disconnected myself for a while, due to various people around me( parents/ my on-a-break partner) . they all have expectation, i also have expectation on myself on how i should behave in front of them.</p>
<p class=”p1″>one thing i wana share, i have picked up running again, and i did it 4 consecutuve days( i stayed in a hotel ocassionaly and they do have gym) I want to join gym again to maintain this habit, i think the endorphines help to lift me up and it helps me to regulate my emotions.</p>
<p class=”p1″>will share again, thanks all</p>