Dear Seaturtle:

“I do my best to consciously refuse to act a certain way to get some perceived approval from them. I am proud of this“- you are giving yourself credit for behaving congruently with your value of authenticity, not people-pleasing at the expense of your authenticity.

“My mom also has/had these poor-me sessions, demanding I see her… It was in this time I believe my mom used me as an emotional venting place….Then 16 when I moved in with him, is when he began to demand this excessive visibility from me“- at different times, both your parents used you as a source of narcissistic supply  (excessive need for attention and/ or admiration).

“I truly feel bad about your thoughtful message getting left without a response, please forgive me“- you are forgiven.