I’m a senior in high school. I’m currently going through the whole college application process, which has been rather tedious, but there’s something that’s making it even more stressful. The thing is, I have a boyfriend. We’ve been dating for 15 months. He graduated a year ahead of me and goes to a college nearby. Things have been great and we’ve still been able to see each other regularly. I’ve wanted to go to his college because it’s in the perfect location, I like the campus, and it’s the perfect size. The only problem is it has limited options for my major. It does have options that I could work with, just not as many as another college I’m looking at. This second college is a little more expensive and further away. I also don’t like the location/campus as much. But it does have a better variety of programs that are more related to my interests. Just recently another option popped up that is basically my “dream college”, it’s not as far away (about 2 hours), except it’s still more expensive than the one my boyfriend goes to…But anyways, we talked about it and he told me I could go wherever and we’d be fine. I know he means well, but I’ve been in one other relationship before that was long distance. It was really hard and eventually led to problems and drifting apart. Now, I know my current boyfriend and I are a lot more compatible and closer than I was with my ex. But the fear that the same thing will happen to us is still there. I’d like to believe that we’d adjust and make it work, and I know it’s considered stupid to even think about making college decisions based on a relationship (because as I’ve been told “an education won’t wake up one day and leave you like a girlfriend or boyfriend could”). I completely get that my education should be the top priority, but that doesn’t help with the fact that I’m completely terrified to go somewhere knowing there’s a huge risk that it’ll ruin everything. Normally I’d be able to make a decision more easily, but he’s different. I know that’s a cliche thing to say, but he really is something that I can’t risk losing. Part of me wants to be “practical” like I know all of you will want me to be, but then another part of me wants to say screw all those statistics and go for the choice that’ll be more comfortable and happy for me-which is being closer to him. I don’t even know for sure if the career path I’m decided on right now will stay the same, so why should I give up something I care so much about for something that could easily change? I mean I changed it at least twice already in the past month or so…The thing is, I’m terrified of going somewhere new where I know no one, even if you tell me I’ll make friends quickly. I’m tempted to just go to his college for my first year because it’ll not only save me money on cheaper classes, it’ll be a smoother and more comfortable transition, I can still major in something I’m interested in (even though I’d be missing out on some other interests that the other colleges have to offer), and I can always transfer. I’m paying for college myself, other than any loans/scholarships I can get, and his college would definitely be less financially stressful.
I don’t know, I just have a lot on my mind and the whole decision has been becoming more and more stressful as application deadlines and graduation gets closer and closer. If the above is a little confusing and too long to read through and respond to I completely understand, but if anyone can offer any advice, I’d greatly appreciate it.
Thanks in advance!