Well, it’s happened again today.

It’s almost half past midday and all I have managed to do is a basic sketch of a lesson plan. I still have another lesson to look at for tomorrow (not even thought about the rest of the week) and coursework to look over.

I feel sick and unable to breathe. The negative thoughts won’t stop coming. I’ve tried using my mindfulness app on my phone, listening to calming music and breathing deeply, but I just feel stuck. I am picking at my skin and genuinely feeling exhausted. I now feel guilty for having been out yesterday and Friday evening and I am scared to work today.

I am so bloody tired of this! I know I have the power to change so why do I keep hurting myself like this? It feels like I am on a hamster wheel. I doubt myself at every turn and find myself whiling away the hours comparing my life to others on Facebook.

Has anyone else experienced this? Is anyone else experiencing this? I am trying meditation but I don’t find that it’s working for me.