Sorry you feel judgement. I just celebrated my 25th wedding anniversary. All I wanted to do was point out that this other man maybe only a wake up to both you and your husband. If there is no longer a reason to be together then run. If you both still love each other and both are willing to work at it you have the chance to save your life time together. It just maybe a different way of getting your marriage fixed. Good luck just make a clean break from either beforehand.