Hi Fred,

You seem self aware and sincere about this. The advice above is amazing – you need to be very grateful for this.

Taking a leap here Fred. Generally, you cannot control everything. “Messes” will happen. Even if you get your gf to change, which is not necessarily advised, what happens when you have kids someday? Or when you have a party there? Or, your cube mate or boss at work is messy. Or, Fred when you or they are sick, or old and gray? Will you deal with those cases with hard requirements that if not met will result in dire consequences? Or, will you show patience and compassion? Something to think about. If you are having something like control issues, look into what you can do to find some balance.

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