Why does Jerry live in the past? Everyone has one, and he should be happy someone wants to have a relationship with him in the present.

I suppose the reason is that the future is the projection of the past. Jerry should have been happy to have someone in the present if that was his need. However, suppose that Jerry wanted one and only one reliable person in his life, a person that assured him she would remain. Assume that Jerry was more willing to be friend with Martha rather than be in a relationship with her if she could not be that reliable. Now it happens that Martha had omitted a fact. So Jerry is scared that she may again still hide things that may hurt him one day, even her promise to not leave each other starts to be less believeble. Jerry is in a trap, whatever he does, he suffers: if he breaks the relationship his needs are not met and he will lose Martha even as friend (he knows things cannot be back the way they were and she will also suffer), if he stays a doubt that she actually care about him will arise, a doubt about whether she will actually remains. Jerry knew this could happen long before the relationship started, that’s why he asked Martha to be truthful. He feels she did not respect him with that omission. On the converse, Martha believes that not everything should have been said, she says that she wanted to spare Jerry the pain of that knowledge. She feels she was right and way better than many other women.

• This reply was modified 10 years, 1 month ago by Vhanon.