dear Ecotone:

It is evident that you cared/ care about this woman. I still have no idea- and you don’t have much of an idea either, I gather- what happened. The relationship with her was online and one phone call and that is not much to go on. It was enough for you to feel so strongly about her though— how we can get hurt after decades of a marriage – or after an online thing and a phone call. What does it take to really know someone? Maybe BOTH in person knowing (which you did not have with her) and good communication (which many, many do not have with the one they live with!)

So next time, with her- if it will be- or with another, guard yourself until well into knowing someone in person, over long enough time and while listening carefully, so you know WHERE you place your heart and give another power over it…?

Both, in person and good communication so you LEARN more about her and about you…

I hope you feel better. Maybe giving up hope with her will be helpful. Sometimes HOPE is a curse.

Take care:
anita